I alluded in my last post that something happened on Mother’s Day. It did, and it is something that the family is still learning to deal with. My son and I have been living with my dad for the past 5 years. On Mother’s Day, he had a stroke. Due to complications, he has only been home 2 days since then.
I still was hoping though… thee was that contest with a road trip…. and I couldn’t compete. Well, I could have but I could not have lived with myself if anything happened while I was away. There was a choice, and I took the one where I could live with myself.
But it hurt. Oh goodness, it hurt not to compete. To give up that dream.
And so… as things go… I was posting things on Facebook that were not my jolly, happy, encouraging self. A friend noticed (hi mel!) and we started talking. And amid everything else, it felt wrong to feel kind of pissed off at the world over a stupid missed opportunity. I hadn’t even won it, but to not even compete! My dream felt like it was crumbling, breaking apart in my hands. My dad’s health uncertain, fiction well dried up and now I can’t even go learn how to do this other type of writing…
Whoa. Wait a minute.
It was actually on one of the days that Dad was home that he mentioned… there was no reason why I could not write about local places to go. Or to send stuff into the local paper. I also can research like a boss, so check check check! It wasn’t what I had wanted… but really, the main dream has always been pen to paper… finding my path.
And a couple of friends along the way. The three of us all went to Jr. High together. We all enjoy writing, and are all at different points of where we are at with it, but ready to try new things. And it turns out that I’m not even writing about travel, per se, but instead about finding God in my nature journeys. The river grounds me spiritually, and I’m enjoying that. Fiction may or may not come back, but at least I’m writing.
I even wrote a poem! If you’re unlucky, I’ll post it! hahahahahahahaha……
Seriously, be good my lovelies…. or I might post my attempt at a poem.
I’ll be back again soon, I promise.