Tag Archive | changing

January 2021

So January was a good one for the writing. Maybe — Maybe not.

I have a story being held for consideration (fingers crossed and good vibes). Which in terms of goals means that I am actually submitting my work.

My writing sister from another mother (hi Rie!) Challenged me to a poem a day for the year. I am missing few days, but I have been doing it. Which is funny because I don’t identify as a poet but….

But when I was pigtails young, I did. I wrote a little chapbook for the school book project. At some point I stopped– lack of confidence, one too many insults? No clue. But I did, and now I am flexing those creaking poetry muscles and it feels good.

And then the cards! I did another batch on cards for the retirement home, which is still on lockdown. 70 this time. I was only able to do it because my bff Linda came over and we cracked them off. AT the beginning of the pandemic lots of people did lots of things for those that were shut in. We need to remember them. So I did– we did.

Writing Cheerleaders vs. Coach

I have many cheerleaders when it comes to my writing and I adore them. They give me the lift of a bit more confidence when I need it. They have cheered me on when I doubted that I could write a sentence, let alone a coherent story. They have been invaluable in my getting to the point where I’m currently at.

And yet even as I’ve been writing stories that I am so proud of, I haven’t been submitting them. Don’t have time to edit, or find markets, weekend was busy, blah blah blah. There’s a ton of excuses and I’ve used many of them. I don’t know why…

So I called someone who I know doesn’t really put up with bullshit. During the conversation, I told her off the bat I don’t need someone to tell me I’m great, I have that confidence. I need someone who can kick my ass. We talked about what I needed to get done, how I needed to change the conversations with myself, and lots of things. Including making a dream board.

I had a lot of goals for that first weekend. I made not a one of them. So I messaged her, told her that and what my new plan was.

Crickets.

Not a word.

I’m sure she thought I was just going to stay stuck in my ways. I considered it.

But I didn’t.

Instead, I hit each and every one of my goals for the week. Made the dream board, checking in with her, got an “awesome!” Out of her and kept moving forward. My stories are submitted, I’m up to date in class and am working on my next submission.

The cheerleaders are invaluable. I wouldn’t be writing without them.

But I wouldn’t have submitted them if I hadn’t had the courage to ask someone to step into the role of coach. She’s not a writer, probably would never to think to read what I write if it wasn’t by me. But she’s tough enough to hold me accountable and not accept any excuses.

Thank you

Wyndie

It’s a strange, strange world

And we all live in it. Some of us even invent ways to make it even stranger, hehe.

I was going through some files from stuff I had written pre-bad times. The thing that struck me about those writings was that the most powerful had to do with not belonging, not fitting in. There might have been things that went bump in the night in my stories, but they were rather glossed over. I didn’t go into too much detail.

Now, looking at my starts and stops and completed things, the thing I notice is that there is something that goes bump in the night and often— it’s something that the character loved once, or someone who should have been a protector.

Harsh.

But somehow, I’m getting to a middle ground. I’ve always been a Pollyanna, looking for the bright side. While searching through the remnants of the me that I used to be (both for good or ill), I realized that I like being a Pollyanna. I like looking for the good, whether in real life or in fiction. It’s one reason why I like romance so much– you are almost always guaranteed a happy ending.

But I also know that there really are things that go bump in the night. And sometimes, the boogeyman is someone you love.

Those two things are mashing up in me right now, and I’m kind of enjoying it. It has also given my fiction a depth it didn’t have before. Since I write fantasy fiction, where often you’re fighting against something other…. I do believe that the boogey man just grew fangs.